Farewell to Kitty

Yesterday we decided to euthenize our 20-year old cat, Edie. These last few weeks of her life, she's been living in our master suite. She was feeble and blind in one eye so having food, bed and litter closer together in a toddler-free space was a comfort to her. She was not a "sweet" cat like Gus. In her youger years she was proud and firey. She would demand to be petted and then nip or swat you if you didn't pet her properly or pet for too long or simply started to annoy her. Despite her temper, she never EVER was aggressive to kids. In that respect she was a feline Ghandi. She would tolerate the most rough handling or being poked in the eye while Xavier said "eyes, eyes!" with glee. As the photos from about 6 weeks ago show, she was even willing to let Xavier pretend that she was her "baby" and feed her from his sippy cup.

But despite our best attempts to accomodate Edie's ailing health, she continued to decline until she was no longer able to walk or clean herself. We will miss our sassy little cat.

A Mother's Rule of Live: Person

I mentioned last month how I'm working my way through Holly Pierlot's recommendations for creating a personal rule as outlined in her book A Mother's Rule of Life: How to Bring Order to Your Home and Peace to Your Soul. I've since settled into a pretty regular prayer routine. I say a quick prayer upon waking, either the Angelus or a rosary at noon, a rosary (if not done earlier) or a bible reading during Jack's nighttime nursing routine, an examination of conscience right before sleeping, and a quick mediation here and there duing, um, bathroom time. I'm certainly not perfect but I have noticed that it gets easier and easier to adhere to the routine each day I do it.

The next "P" in her rule development is "person" or taking care of one's own physical, psychological and spiritual need for refreshment...mostly through the use of personal time. I admit that this is absolutely the most difficult one for me to do. Even when I do carve out time for just myself, I'm apt to reliquish it should anything come up with my family. In her book, Holly writes about taking a "mother's Sabbath" every other Saturday. She spends the day going to museums, visiting friends, etc. while her husband takes care of their home and kids. There's absolutely no way that I'd feel comfortable doing that. I don't know why since I do recognize the need for personal time. I don't begrudge my husband his 1-hour gym trip most days of the week for instance.

I'm starting by taking very small baby steps towards this. Xavier still naps 1-3 hours each day now. I actively concentrate on spending at least one hour of that time doing something that is refreshing for me. No tasks, no cleaning, no drawing up shopping lists. The hard thing is that I actually enjoy doing homemaking types of activities and ticking things off my "to-do" list but they do not refresh me. I'm also incorporating things that refresh me in our daily activities. The best example of this is the 1/2 hour Xavier and I spend each day gardening in the back yard now. It is frustrating at times to have him dig up a bulb I just planted or step on the bed I just tilled, but I figure that once we both get the hang of it, this will be a nice activity we can share.

The other aspect of my "person" section of my rule is getting adequate sleep. I'm in bed by 10 p.m. sharp now. If I wake up in the night, I try to avoid TV or internet as that just ends up being too stimulating.

Tot School

Xavier, 21 months

Each day I try to devote a little time to making sure Xavier has a rich and diverse learning environment here at home. While I know at this age he is learning all the time (and his imaginative play surely indicates that he is watching us closely) I think that a little focus now and then is in keeping with the best of Charlotte Mason and Montessori teaching philosophies that I admire. The Tot School link above is one of the websites that I find particularly helpful in generating ideas.

This week we did a lot of reading. In the book basket for the week are:

Corduroy

My Big Green Pocketbook

The Baby Sister

My Big Boy Potty

Pop Worhol's Top

Xavier learned how to plant seeds and water them. We talked about how seedlings will poke up through the dirt but I'm not sure if he will truely understand until they show themselves in a few days.

For arts and crafts, we made a lifesized drawing of Xavier. I laid out some postal wrapping paper and traced his body. He didn't want to color at first so I just asked where certain body parts should go (nose, eyes, fingers) and filled them in where he pointed. Later he added some scribbles of his own. Then we used masking tape (the boy LOVES tape) to put the drawing on his bedroom door. I'm not sure if it is related to this project or not, but this was the first week that I recall Xavier saying his own name. The power of the self-portrait to provide self awareness I suppose!

Social Smiles and Outdoor Exploration

Here's some more photos for the grandmas and all the other folks who've been champing at the bit!

A Season to Plan

I was planning my backyard garden the other day when I came across this article about the prospective rise of vegetable prices due to weather and economic conditions in California. Since lettuce was already on my growing list, I felt like I was at least a little ahead of the curve on this one.


While leafing through the pretty seed catalogues that I ordered, I was tempted to go hog wild with planting large and bizarre crops and turn my entire back yard into something like this urban homestead. When it comes to gardening though I think slow and steady is the best approach for me.

So I've selected a few peppers, tomatoes and okra seeds to add to my stored seeds of beans, squash, lettuce, spinach and collards. I've also got quite an extensive herb list including chammomile for tea! I've never grown tomatoes or peppers from seed before (both are notoriously difficult for a beginner) but I figure even if I fail and need to buy seedlings from the nursury in a few months, I'll only be out a few bucks for the packets of seeds. I found a seed starter tray at the dollar store this week for $4 (which was about $12 less than the catalogue version).

Today Xavier and I planted some collards, lettuce, and spinach in my square foot garden bed. He was fairly stubborn about digging up any and all seeds I planted until I gave him the "magic watering can." Instantly he went from tantruming toddler who didn't understand why mommy was ruining all his fun, to a perfectly wonderful little helper.

So far, the running total for Garden 2009:

Expenses: $4.00

Yeild: zip

Hermit Day

Xavier, Jack and I spent yesterday holed up in our cozy house. It was rather cold outside and I wasn't feeling quite 100%. I strained my lower back earlier in the week by doing a few too many errands with the boys in tow. I also was feeling achy and fatigued.

So I pared down our activities to the bare minimum. If it didn't contribute to the direct feeding, clothing or health of me or my family, it just didn't rank up there with necessary activities. I only picked up Xavier to put him in his crib. He seemed to enjoy the novelty of diaper changes on the floor or being allowed to climb up and down out of his kitchen chair with me spotting him. I realized that he is capable of quite a bit more bit more than I previously realized. He is becoming so independent.

It may have been more than a coincidence that yestday's Saint of the Day was St. Paul the Hermit. I'm not ready

Photos

Okay, and now for what you really want...photos of the boys. Here's one of Jack from Christmas in an outfit sent to him by my mother's office staff. He is now too long to wear this onesie anymore. Time to break into the 3-6 month clothing stash!

This is Jack today as he sleeps in his bouncy seat. I promise that he does smile and open his eyes...just not when I have the camera handy.

And here's big brother Xavier chowing down on lunch. Notice the big boy cup! He's getting fairly handy with a spoon and fork too although you wouldn't know it from this finger food lunch of sandwiches, strawberries and dried fruit bits.

I hope to take some more over the next few days...especially of Jack. Poor kid already is succumbing to second-child-no-photo syndrome. As a second child myself you'd think I'd know better.

Rules over Resolutions: Prayer

This post is a little late for the New Year but I'm still trying to get into the groove with two little boys under the age of two around here. While we were in Houston waiting for Jack to get well, I started reading a book called A Mother's Rule of Life: How to Bring Order to Your Home and Peace to Your Soul by Holly Pierlot. She advocates creating a rule (a la St. Benedict) for your life in order to be able to more fully fill your vocation and not get distracted by the clutter of busywork. While it is geared toward Catholic moms, it certainly has a lot of spiritual wisdom that I could have used before I married or even returned to the Catholic faith.

Perhaps the most valuable lesson from this book that I've learned thus far is that I've been trying to do too much. There just aren't enough hours in the day for me to do all the things that I'd like to right now and do what I need to do to run a smooth home with two littles. It has also made me realize how much time I fritter away "multitasking" or trying to outline for the umpteenth time what needs to get done for the week. I need to prioritize, commit to what I can, and as for the rest, let it go.

So this year, instead of making a resolution that requires me to add something new to my life (exercise regime, reading Great Books, etc.), I'm going to focus on developing and committing to my own rule. While the fruits of my labor may look the same for each (its amazing how much more I get accomplished with this new approach despite the focus on simplicity) I'm hopeful that it will be more rewarding to adopt and implement a rule.

The author identifies five "P's" to focus on: Prayer, Person, Partner, Parent, Provider. I thought it might be fun to keep a running tab on my approach and progress with each. Here goes.

PRAYER
She guides you through the rule creation process by first scheduling time for prayer. This can include spiritual reading, bible study, Mass etc. I've decided to set aside time at morning, midday and afternoon to this. In addition, I'm making a committment to do monthly reconciliation. Now that I'm about midway through the month, I'll admit that I don't make it each and every day, but I am getting better. What is amazing to me though is how much smoother my days go when I stop to take the time to reconnect with God.

This step reminds me quite a bit of the financial wisdom to put money away in savings before spending any of your paycheck. Before long, saving becomes a habit without much thought. This has certainly proven true for me with money so I imagine that the same will be true for prayer.

So each day is ordered around prayer time. I'm still figuring out what to do when since I have several different prayer time activities that I like (rosary, meditation, Ignatius Press bible study, the Angelus, etc.). I'm also trying out a few prayer modes that I've not done before (Devine Office) or that I have discarded in the past (Devine Mercy Chaplet).

We're Home!

I was afraid to jinx it by posting earlier but we were able to bring baby Jack home from Houston this afternoon. He is sleeping well right now--one of the benefits of being in a NICU for 10 days is the ability to sleep through anything! Because Jack's been in a pristine environment for nearly two weeks, the doctors advise us to keep him away from crowds, too many visitors or lots of other kids for another two weeks. I'm looking forward to a few days of just bonding with my baby, toddler and husband.

Xavier comes home tomorrow after having the time of his life with my extended family. I understand from my mother that he has new words and new tricks.

Our cat Edie is beginning to forgive us for being gone for so long. She took one look at Jack and looked up at me as if to say, "You brought home another one?!"

On the Receiving End

It's not everyday that you come home to a nice meal served up to you by a professional basketball player. The Houston Rockets, their dance team, and a bunch of folks from Southwest Airlines were at the RMH last night doing just that. The kids loved it as did most of the parents. It made me tear up a little.

It was relatively more comfortable for me to be on the receiving end of so much help and support from family and friends who have provided everything from childcare to cat sitting to hotel accommodations. I'm slowly getting used to the feelings that receiving good works from complete strangers bring. I'm learning that it is a special grace to be able to allow others to help you in your time of need. There are all sorts of unseen hands lifting us up right now. They deliver pizzas to the RMH in the hospital, bring by little stuffed bears for the sick kids, or even just sing Christmas carols in the lobby for us to enjoy. I still get overwhelmed by it all from time to time but I'm beginning to accept that by this experience as the receiver we'll be better givers in the future.

Two Bits of Good News

Today brings good news on two fronts. First, the blood pressure in Jack's left arm has increased slightly which MAY indicate that a clot in the artery is being diminished by the medicine he is on. Tomorrow's Doppler scan will reveal more on that front. In any case, it is a little more positive than the "stable and waiting" position we've been in for the past few days.

Our second bit of good news is that Tim and I are making preparations to have Xavier join us here...perhaps as early as Sunday afternoon! It has been less than a week since I laid eyes on him but I crave his presence.

Tim and I checked out the Sibling Place here at TCH. It is a daycare-like, supervised play center open for a few hours three days a week. Its mission is to help parents of NICU babies have a nearby place for their other kids while visiting. We met one of the caregivers who was very friendly.

We also found a small outdoor courtyard connected to the RMH here in the hospital.
Between the other kids, the pretty nurses, and the available food here, I am sure Xavier will have a good time hanging out with Mom or Dad while the other one of us is with Jack or busy with other day-to-day stuff like napping. I think we are all looking forward to just sitting down to dinner together again as a family. Simple pleasures indeed.

Photos!

Here's an updated one of Jack. I want to try again to get a better shot but as you can see he's a cutie.

Here's one of Xavier and his cousin Matt playing chef at my sister's house. I know he is having a great time there but we miss him so.

The labs on Jack are trickling in and we hope to have a report from hematology this afternoon. So far nothing that has come back thus far indicates a clotting disorder which we hope continues. Friday Jack has another Doppler scan of his shoulder to assess if the clot has changed at all and to plan a course for further diagnostic testing.

Jack is scheduled for a follow up Doppler of his arm on Friday morning which will give us more information about the clot, if it is growing or shrinking or staying the same, and further exploration.

Oh McDonald's!

After being on the waiting list, Tim and I finally got a room in the larger Ronald McDonald House a mile or so down the road from the hospital. For those of you not familiar with the program (as I wasn't just a few days ago) it is a part communal living/part private quarters place that houses families of kids who are hospitalized or undergoing treatment.

Part of the reason for the wait for us was the fact that the floor we are on was damaged by Hurricane Ike. They just opened it up (replete with fresh paint and new carpet) today and boom, we were in. Our room is quite large with floor to ceiling picture windows. Food or drink is not allowed in the rooms and reservable television rooms are down the hall. It is a cross between a nicely appointed hotel, a dorm room, and a monastery (think simplicity).

Downstairs we have our own cubby in a freezer, a fridge and a pantry in the large kitchen with several cooking bays. Nearly every night a different organization or company sponsors dinner which makes for less work and clean up. There are activities for the kids staying here like a Teddy Bear Clinic where kids can get a health and hygiene lesson by using their stuffed animals as role models.

In addition to a significantly lower cost than a hotel, it is just nice and normalizing to be around other families who are in the same boat. Part of the way they keep costs down here is that each family has a communal chore to do to help keep the common areas clean. Ours is emptying the three small garbage cans each night in the outdoor BBQ pavilion. As it is freezing cold right now, we basically have the EASIEST job you could think of. Peek into three garbage cans to confirm that they are indeed empty and you're done!

Jack continues to do well. We are still waiting on some bloodwork the hematologists ordered to come back to discern if the clot is an anomaly or an indication that he may have some sort of ongoing condition that causes clotting issues for him. The clot still is in place as the nurses aren't able to find a pulse in his elbow or wrist yet. (By the way, this is less gruesome than it sounds since the smaller blood vessels are doing a great job of supplying his arm with blood.) While we are waiting on those results, Dr. Leonard, Jack's neonatologist, has asked the TCH vascular surgeons to consult to start pulling together information from their team and other medical centers around the country on procedural/surgical treatment options and experiences with similar cases. That way if the medications alone don't clear the clot, they will have a plan in place for next steps ready to go.

I will try to take some photos of Jack later today. He is beginning to lose that old-man-mystic-on-the-mountain-top look so common to newborns. He is fattening up and getting that lovely plump baby face. Nursing is going well as is pumping. I take a little delight in knowing that he's had virtually nothing but mother's milk since birth. The milk banking/nursing support at TCH is fantastic...a ideal model for how I wish the rest of society could be for all the other nursing moms out there.

That's all for now! Keep those prayers a'coming! They are certainly keeping us lifted up.

Photos

Jack is doing well today. The medical team was able to get the right dose of Lovinox (blood thinner) for him so I'm hoping this will result in fewer blood draws in the future. He is a real trooper though and hardly cries as long as he is getting a little sugar water on a pacifier while being stuck. We wait now to see if the blood pressure in his left arm increases as a result.

Tim and I checked into an extended stay hotel last night. It is nice to have a little kitchen in our room. The hotel is brand new...maybe too brand new. They are having issues setting up their internet and phone system right now. If it isn't resolved we will moving down the road to another similar hotel.

We went to a wonderful noon Mass today across the way at St. Luke's Hospital. The gospel and homily were about John the Baptist and how he pointed the way toward the refreshment and peace of Christ. I can only think how our experiences right now with our John, an Advent baby, is also leading us into a deeper walk with Jesus as we head toward Christmastime too.


Xavier went back to Louisiana to stay with family there while Tim and I are here in Houston. He had a slumber party with his cousin Matt last night and my sister reports that they are both as cute as can be. Matt is such a good host, making sure Xavier has diapers, stuffed animals to sleep with and even a night light. As you can see by this photo from my brother-in-law, I think Xavier may take after his auntie's musical interests. We can only hope!

Welcome to the World Jack!

It is with great joy that I write to tell you of the birth of our second son, John Andrew McNicholl. We have taken to calling him Jack. He was born on Monday, December 8th weighing 7lbs, 13 oz and measuring 19 inches. He and I spent two comfy days together at the hospital when the medical team at St. Elizabeth's noticed that Jack's blood pressure in his left arm was lower than his right. In every other way he is a healthy baby boy but the condition was a cause for concern. After a series of tests and observations in Beaumont, Jack was transported on Wednesday night to Texas Children's Hospital in Houston, a world-class facility, for more in depth investigation.

Jack's medical team here is carefully zeroing in on a firm diagnosis but it appears that he has a clot in the subclavian artery leading to his left arm. According to his neonatologist, this is an extremely rare condition--only four other cases of this sort (not induced by previous medication or medical treatment) have been documented around the world. Fortunately his arm is healthy, pink and fully functioning meaning that his little body has already managed its own "work around" solution for now. I can't stress enough that right now in every other way he is happy, healthy and typical--something that Tim and I are increasingly grateful for the more time we spend here in the TCH environment around babies in much more critical condition than Jack's. Our hope is that he will remain "Mr. Regular" as the nurses call him on the ward and have no other external symptoms while this condition is assessed and corrected.

Tim and I are staying in Houston close to TCH and each day we hope to get closer to a resolution. Until then we will be posting updates about Jack and the rest of the McNicholl clan on my personal blog. For privacy purposes, I may be adding a password access feature to the blog this weekend so you may need to register to access it soon.

We welcome all prayers and well-wishing comments/e-mails, but for now ask that folks not come to visit us at the hospital or call. We are focused on getting our little Jack healthy enough for a return home to Beaumont. You may share our news about Jack with others friends and family whom may not have been on our e-mail list (especially those who are not connected to the internet!). If you do so, please just reiterate our strong desire not to receive phone calls or visits at this time. Again, prayers and e-mails are the best support we can ask for right now.

I hope to have more photos up on the blog by tomorrow!

Advent

After a little scrambling I got our Advent wreath up in our dining room. I was determined to have some sign of Advent around here since I decided not to put garland around our door. You wouldn't believe how difficult it is to find purple and pink candles this time of year!

The white candle in the center is our Immaculate Conception candle representing Mary. I'm jumping the gun on this one a little since the Feast of the Immaculate Conception isn't until December 8th, but I'm planning to be a little busy that day giving birth. I carved out a small space in the candle and hid a little baby Jesus inside behind some ribbon. On Christmas I'll remove the covering to represent the birth.

Since Tim and I got married, we've made the choice to really focus on Advent up until Christmas Vigil on December 24th. Advent is chock full of special feasts (St. Francis Xavier, St. Nicholas, St. Lucy....) and traditions (Advent songs and prayers, Jesse tree...) and I hate to miss the joy of antipation in the rush to celebrate Christmas. With Christmas shopping, parties, and music starting in early November now in the popular culture, it often feels as if we are swimming up the culture stream on this one.

I know that Xavier is too young to "get" a lot of what we're doing but I feel like it is part of my job as a homemaker and mother to create our own domestic church environment. He and his siblings will be able to say that we've been celebrating saints' feasts and Advent "for as long as they can remember." Besides, the commemorations are as much for me and my husband as they are for the kids.

I've Let Myself Go

Well, it's official. I've got one more week until my scheduled C-section and I've given up any pretense of fashionability. Since about my 30th week of pregnancy my OB has marvelled at my large fundal size. I'm pretty much normal in the legs and arms, and I am told that from the back you can't even tell that I'm pregnant. My profile, however, clearly shows a baby waiting to be born. At 37 weeks, I have the tummy size of a mother of twins in week 42.

All of my maternity pants, including the sweatpants, are too binding now when I sit down. So I've resorted to wearing all skirts. This poses two fashion delimas. First, all three of my skirts are summery, peasant skirts. One of them is even *gasp!* white! Second, because the skirts flow away from me as do the remaining shirts (all fall tones of course) that cover my belly adequately, I look huge. Seriously, it is as if I'm wearing a multi-part, mismatched burqua minus the head scarf.

I held out as long as I could but Sunday I threw caution to the wind and just embraced the hilarity of it all. You should have seen what I wore to mass. No, I haven't taken any photographs and no, I don't plan to either. You'll just have to imagine it!

Shoes!

Xavier's language skills have exploded in the past three weeks. By our last count, he has approximately 35 words now. Admittedly most of his words are only recognizable to my husband and me, but once you familiarize yourself with the Xavier dialect you too can translate. Body parts, common foods and articles of clothing are his most used words. Here's a running list:

Bye-Bye
Night Night
Car Car
Da Da
MaMa
Booms (grapes)
Nanna (banana)
Bapple (apple)
Cheese
Cracker
Juice
Titee (kitty)
Woof Woof (dog)
Bzzzz (bee)
Moon
Bowl
Spoon
Spider
Shoes
Socks
DiDi (diaper)
Botty (potty)
Bight (light)
Bah (bath)
NaNa (nose)
Belbow (elbow)
Beyebu (bellybutton)
Shin (chin)
Tee (teeth)

Here's a short clip of him walking around in two pairs of shoes (mine and his). If you listen closely, you can hear him say the word "shoes" at the very end.

Halloween Pics

Sorry for the lack of communication. I keep starting deep and profound posts about spirituality and the economy and editing them into oblivion before deleting them altogether. So until I get over my writers block and get over myself, here's the short and sweet: two photos from Halloween.

Here's Xavier's daytime outfit:

And Xavier's skeleton costume. That's his BFF, Ethan as the frog hopping around in front of him.

The boys went to about 10 houses before we called it a night. Xavier wasn't too sure about the whole thing but enjoyed pointing out all the cats and dogs in the neighborhood. Ethan enjoyed knocking on doors but seemed perplexed as to why we kept knocking on doors but not going inside to play. Too cute!

Wild Kingdom Presents: Part II

Just a sweet video to share this morning. Yesterday Xavier toddled off to his room while I was in the kitchen. After about 45 minutes of quiet, I tiptoed in to investigate. These were my findings:


In case it isn't clear, at the end of the video, Xavier is plopping down in my lap--too sweet.

Mrs. Fix-It

Well we are getting back to normal here after Hurricane Ike. We have a fence that is blown down and we'll be needing to get new carpet but compared to some of our neighbors, we are doing very, very well.

I've decided to make a list of all the little repairs around the house that I've been meaning to get to for a while. One thing about inspecting your home inside and out for storm damage, it seems to clear my vision to see those small things that I pass up everyday.

Today my first project was to set up the garden trellis that I made out of PVC pipe, screws, and twine (again!). My green beans are pretty much the only crop that has survived both Ike and Gustav. Poor things were scrambling all over the ground with no vertical apparatus to climb.

I was so inspired by that project (and Xavier was still napping!) that I decided to straighten out our garage. Xavier likes to accompany me when I do laundry in there, and his curiousity was beginning to outpace the modicum of childproofing I had done out there early last spring.

This was my big accomplishment:

I took down this peg board several months ago to install some heavy duty shelves. Originally I had intended to reinstall it below the shelves but I realize now that would have been too low. So I put up the new peg board in the narrow space beside the washing machine. I figure it is a handy way for me to make sure our of the corner of my eye that Xavier isn't getting into it when I'm putting things in the dryer.

Those of you who may be concerned that I'm doing all this physical work while 28 weeks pregnant need not fear. Doing a little handy work is much less exhausting or taxing than taking Xavier to the playground and we do that several times a week.

My next project that I hope to tackle is to rescreen all the windows in our home. With the weather getting cooler, I'd really like to keep our windows open more to get more fresh air in our home. According to an article I read a while back, modern homes are much more energy efficient but tend to have more air pollution because less fresh air flows in and out. The only thing that keeps me from leaving the windows open most days and evenings is the screens. Some have holes in them. The flimsy polyester netting on others has been damaged by a certain toddler's explorations.

I plan to replace the polyester screen with standard aluminium screen to make them sturdier. This will be a first-time project for me so I'll let you know how it goes.

Half Empty or Half Full?

Half Empty: I'm still battling the head and chest cold that I've had for over a week now. Evacuating while sniffling and hacking is no picnic.

Half Full: Xavier, Master of Imitation, has now taught himself how to blow his nose in a tissue and throw it in the trashcan based on Mom's multiple demonstrations. Too cute.

Photo Dump

No time to post thoughtful insights today but I didn't want to hold onto these photos any longer:

Xavier with "Lovey Smith." He likes to walk around the house with him on his head for some reason.

Great photo of Xav. Not so great photo of me.

Xavier and his Auntie Ashley.

And Away We Go

Xavier and I spent last week in Louisiana visiting family while Tim was at a conference in Germany. One afternoon we had a playdate with Cousin Matthew at Aunt Leanne's house. After a yummy lunch, the boys played and Leanne and I got to catch up. Matthew received a sports car for his birthday this month and was kind enough to take Xavier for a spin. As you can see, Xavier had mixed emotions about the experience!

Babies to Toddlers

I've taken to calling Xavier the "toddler" and the babe in my belly the "baby" for clarity's sake. I have to admit that each day Xavier is becoming more toddler like and less babyish. Perhaps the biggest transition is weaning process. After I reached my goal of nursing for at least the first year, I decided to gradually let Xavier take the lead on the weaning process. The homemaker lifestyle allows for a certain amount of flexibility when it comes to transitions and I planned to take full advantage of it.

We've slowly cut out wake-up and bedtime nursing and are slowly working on eliminating nursing to nap. Today was the first day he napped without a car ride or nursing. Big step for both of us.

Other toddler-like behavior of late:

• drinks from a juicebox
• climbs the playground equipment
• helps clean up messes
• can eat with a spoon and fork when motivated
• enjoys coloring

The Fall Garden

This week I've been working in the garden again. During Xavier's nap I was able to turn the compost heap which revealed a huge pile of rich, black soil. I pulled up everything in the bed save one tomato plant that had three green tomatoes on it. After working the compost into the soil, I headed off to the hardware store to get some seeds and transplants.

Each season I dally with the idea of ordering desiner seeds online from Cooks Garden, Park Seeds, or the like. I get overwhelmed with the choices and doubts about whether their seeds would work in our humid Beaumont climate.

The hardware store didn't have any transplants (I'm hoping to find some tomato and bell peppers at the nursery later this week) but they did have seeds. In making my wish list, I decided to only buy things that we actually EAT rather than just things that grow easily. I've resigned myself to the fact that we just don't care for radishes and teeny tiny carrots. So my list included pole beans, cucumbers, spinach, small eating pumpkins, and various herbs.

Using a book from the library, I identified several varieties of seeds that work well in our climate. Unfortuantely not everything on my wish list was easily available but I was able to make do with what they had. So hopefully in a few months we'll have pole beans, spinach, collards, lettuce, arugala, thyme, parsley, and cilantro.

Eduoard

Just a quick update to let friends and family know that yes, we did get hit by Tropical Storm Eduoard and that we are all doing just fine. The storm rolled in around 6 a.m. this morning. By 8 a.m. our power went out due to a transformer a few miles away. About three hours later power was back on. No damage to our home but my vegetable garden took quite a beating. I'm afraid the tomatoes may be goners since they were getting a little too tall anyway. No big deal since it was time to start enriching the soil and planting the fall garden anyway. Thank heaven for small blessings.

Can You Hear Me Now?

I'll admit that in the past I often talked on my cell phone while driving. I knew it wasn't ideal but the commute to and from work was boring and a good time to catch up with friends and family. Besides, with all those free nights and weekend minutes who could resist?

After we switched to a minimal Tracfone plan to use a cell phone only when travelling, I started to notice how many near accidents involved a driver on a cell phone. In my personal experience, risky drivers who swerved into my lane, ran a red light, or nearly rear ended me were almost always talking on cell phones.

A few months ago I started doing a little online research about the actual risks of driving and cell phone usage. Today's Salon article here does a fairly good round up of all the latest data. Unless you live in one of the states where driving and dialing is now illegal, it is up to you to decide how much of a risk you want to take. But please consider this post my official request to all friends and family not to call me while driving anymore. You are too precious to me!

Graduation Day

Xavier and I officially completed our Parent & Tot swim lessons today. It wasn't easy, it was relatively chilly this morning (about 75 degrees) and raining through most of the lesson. Without any lightening though, we had the okay to finish up our class by the swim director.

When we started lessons, I thought our instructor, Reed, was being unrealistic with some of the things he asked of Xavier. But sure enough, after an hour of practice for two weeks Xavier can now:

• climb out of the pool with a small boost on one of his feet


• walk in water up to his shoulders


• jump into the pool into my arms upon prompting


• hang onto a noodle and float with his legs behind him (with me spotting him)


• straddle a noodle and sit up straight (with me spotting him)


• occasionally blow bubbles (rare!)


• reach for toys or people when being held on his tummy in the water


• occasionally kick with the noodle or when being held on his tummy


• be passed underwater from me to the instructor while holding his breath


• move along the wall doing a hand-to-hand monkey walk (with me spotting him)

He still needs to work on bubble blowing, scooping and kicking but I'm very proud of his accomplishments thus far.

Well that's one way to clean the bathroom floor

Xavier and I have been attending Mommy & Me swim lessons for the last week and a half. Class runs from 8-9 a.m. By the time we get back home, Xavier usually is sacked out and I hop into the shower quickly before taking a nap myself. I'm usually in a mad dash to get something to eat, get clean, and get in bed so I can actually sleep before Xavier wakes up.

This morning I put my bathing suit in the sink, ran the water, grabbed a muffin, hopped in the shower, and...did you catch it? Thank goodness I take short showers in general. I turned off the water and heard the ominous sound of MORE water running. Yep. I left the sink on and managed to flood the bathroom with a half inch of water.

I threw on my bathrobe and dashed to the garage where we keep about a dozen extra bath towels in various stages of decrepitude. About fifteen minutes later I had a laundry basket filled with soggy towels to bring back to the garage.

My bathroom floor has never been so sparkly.

Some Things Just Don't Photograph

There are so many times during each day that I am tickled by something Xavier does or "says" (still no "mama") or a beautiful sunrise outsid the kitchen window, or the golden goodness of a homemade loaf of bread, that I'm tempted to grab the camera to take a video or snapshot. But the act of getting up, taking out the camera, turning it on, and aiming it would ruin the very moment I was trying to capture. So you must take my word for it that what you see on this blog is just a smidgen of the loveliness that fills our lives.

The latest unphotographed event worth mentioning is Xavier's habit of imitating Tim and me doing everyday activities. Monday I was clearing off the the kitchen countertops and scrubbing them with hot water and bleach. Xavier grabbed a dishtowel off the tabletop and started wiping down his cabinet where we store his dishes and cups. Later that day when I was emptying the dishwasher, he would put his dishes away in his newly wiped cabinet.

But the cutest example by far is his imitation of Dad leaving for work in the morning. He slings Tim's thermal lunch bag over his shoulder, kisses Mommy, waves goodbye and walks out the room. Then he does this again. And again. And again. Once he did it eight times in a row before tiring of the game. Adorable.

Up, Up and Away

Xavier has started to try to climb things. Here he is on a small workout step that I use as a stool in the bath and kitchen. He is so proud of himself! Thankfully we have a few more days before he able to climb up on chairs, sofas or beds. We've already had to reinforce that coffee tables are not for climbing either. I just wish there was a toddler playground nearby to let him burn off all this climbing energy. Sadly, all the parks have "big kid" equipment that is still too advanced for him to use on his own.

The Useful Backyard

Our backyard has been earning its keep lately. While it is considered small (50x15) it certainly has plenty of room for fun, beauty and work. We have a few flowering beds here and there for asthetics and a lovely patio and grilling pad safely away from the house.

My square foot garden raised bed is just outside my kitchen window so I can easily see what needs to be harvested or watered. This year I didn't manage to plant veggies in all of the 16 square feet. The zucchini and hooked yellow squash didn't seem to be very happy there. I think I will try to plant those seeds again in the fall in another place. I have two types of tomato plants both of which are producing fruit as fast as we can eat it. It is a relief that we don't have to worry about somenella from our tomatoes. I've had a few bell peppers this summer, but not nearly as many as last year. In an open spot I planted some cosmos seeds that came free in the mail. I had no idea how tall they would get but they have provided us with cut flowers all summer.

In one corner, partially hidden from the neighbors by a sumac tree, I have my lovely new clothesline that my husband gave me for Mother's Day. I was all excited to start saving money on our electric bills by air drying laundry as much as possible. About two weeks into the project I realized that while our dryer is powered by electricity it is heated with natural gas. I am still saving energy but not quite as much money on power bills as I had hoped. You can't beat that line-dried frangrance though.

In the far corner of the yard I keep a compost pile. I made it about two years ago with $5 worht of chicken wire. I would love to have a more attractive container like this or this, but I can't really justify the expense. I've been keeping my eyes peeled for a few pallets to create a two-bin wooden composting station that is beautiful too.

When I first started putting our backyard to work, I was a bit embarrassed to have people see it. It certainly wouldn't be the sort of yard featured in a issue of Better Homes and Gardens. I've been amazed though at how many people admire the work elements of our backyard. At least half a dozen times I've had visitors tell me that they wish they had a clothesline/vegetable garden/compost pile or whatever but they were afraid of what their neighbors or spouse would think.

It has made me realize that there is a certain beauty in a functional outdoor space. It is the outdoor equivalent of homebaked bread or simply furnished but tidy home. It indicates a lifestyle that goes against the tide of "aspirational" decor that dominates home improvement shows and magazines that I find so tempting but that always seem to make me feel a bit shabby(I'm looking at you HGTV!). Instead, it seems to reflect a well ordered home (or homestead).

My backyard is still a work in progress. I'd like to create another bed behind the clothesline for larger climbing vegetables, grow a few herbs in pots on the patio, repaint and repair our two metal patio chairs and perhaps add a table to make the space a little more inviting for relaxing and entertaining. But now I'm thinking in terms of what is useful and beautiful instead of just worrying about how things will look.

Strike One for Freedom

While Xavier and Dad were down at the university, I took advantage of the kid-free opportunity to put a few more safety latches around the house. With my first round of childproofing several months ago, I installed latches on anything that contained dangerous or heavy items. I left the other cabinets latch-free in part in an effort to apply some Montessori principles to our home. He was safe and I could count on him entertaining himself for a while pulling stuff out of the "safe cabinets." The only drawback was that I had to throw things back in each cabinet at the end of the day.

However, Xavier's new mobility plus my ever-expanding waistline has necessitated a change. I was finding pot lids in the bathroom and my hair dryer in the kitchen on a regular basis. The sheer amount of random stuff laying about was getting exhausting to look at much less pick up and put away.

I thought Xavier would protest about his newfound lack of of exploratory opportunities. He seems to be taking it in stride though and just turns his attention to other things. I think he, like his mother, actually feels more peaceful with the reduction of clutter.

At First Glance

While some of you may already have heard the news, I'd like to officially announce that we are awaiting the newest addition to our family in mid-December. Like last time, we are going to let the sex of the baby be a surprise.

This photo is a bit old...two and half weeks to be exact. When I went in for a check up the nurse couldn't locate the heartbeat so they opted for an ultrasound. While the half hour I waited to confirm the babe's wellbeing was nerve wracking to say the least, getting an earlier than usual photograph was a nice recompense.

My OB swears that the photo is "adorable" but I think he's just used to saying nice things to moms in their first trimester. I'm just glad he or she has two legs, two arms and one head. Adorable indeed.

Today I celebrate my entrance into the second trimester. No more nausea!

New Skillz

Xavier has been picking up news skills left and right from his big sister. He's starting to "draw" using his magnetic/erase board. I think crayons aren't far behind. I fear for my walls.

He's also been practicing his war cries. This is a neat little trick to get him to stop fussing and start laughing after a minor bump or scrape.

Hunter finishes up her first week of basketball camp today. She and I have a park date tomorrow so she can show me her new tricks around the hoop.

Eating as a Family

We've been having lots of fun these past two weeks with my step-daughter, Hunter, here for her 4-week summer stay. She's a real sport about adjusting to the separate traditions and rules from her Kansas home and her Texas home. A big stumbling block lately has been food.

As most of you know, Tim and I do our best to eat a healthy, whole foods diet most of the time. (Not to be confused with an expesive Whole Foods diet!) We like to cook from scratch when possible, prefer fresh veggies to frozen to canned, and avoid products with transfat, artificial coloring or high fructose corn syrup. We're not terribly strict about it -- we've been known to have a soda, bag of chips or spicy buffalo wings from the freezer section from time to time.

Hunter's favorite foods are speghetti (no sauce), ramen noodles, Sunny Delight (which has no juice in it by the way), and rice with butter. "Gross" foods include lettuce, tomatoes, fish, chicken with bones, cucumbers, etc.

In an effort to get her more enthusiastic about nutrition, Wednesday night is her night to plan and prepare dinner. I blanched when I saw her shopping list: two cans of cherry pie filling, two cans of pineapple, one can of mandarin oranges, one can of creamy corn, a package of hot dogs, and a box of mac and cheese. I gently suggested that she should add a green vegetable to round out the meal so she added a can of peas to her list. I prayed that the cherry pie filling would not find its way into the same dish as the hot dogs. I hoped for the best and was determined to be a good example of being open to new foods.

She made a fruit salad with the cans of fruit, split and sauteed the hotdogs (I cheated a little and bought kosher beef franks), and served corn, pasta and peas for the sides. All in all it was a yummy meal. I can't wait to see what's on the menu for next Wednesday.

Walking Man

We have honest to goodness walking over here now. For weeks Xavier has been teasing us with nonchalant cruising with one hand and the occaisional lunge from the coffee table to the sofa. On Saturday he was regularly pulling up and then taking several steps out into the middle of the room.

He is such an independent little dude. He refuses to walk upon command (or encouragement) but if you leave him be, he's walking like a little champ.

The timing of his walking is probably related to having his big sister around for the past week. Hunter is the object of his affection these days. This is particularly sweet since during her stay with us last summer, she missed witnessing her younger sister's transition from crawling to walking with her family in Kansas.

As a direct result of Xavier's new mobility, our 19-year-old cat has taken up permenant residence behind the couch unless Xavier is in a high chair or napping. Poor dear.

Wild Kingdom Presents:

a one-year-old toddler in his natural habitat:

And at the watering hole eating Chef-boy-ardee:

Meet the (Grand)Parents

Xavier got to meet his Grandma and Grandpa McNicholl this weekend. While he's "spoken" to them on the phone several times, this was the first time he got to see them face to face. As usual, Xavier worked his usual charm and showed them all his tricks: bear crawling, chasing the cat, drinking out of a cup, etc.
Xavier opens one of his birthday gifts.

Grandma and Grandpa gave Xavier the rocker that his Dad used to sit in to watch Sesame Street.
Three generations of McNicholl men.

Grandma gets a smile out of baby Xavier.

And Then We Were One

It's hard to believe that it was just a year ago today when I got to meet baby Xavier face-to-face for the very first time. He was born via c-section and I still remember his face as they lifted him up and over the drape. His arms were outstretched to the sides and his fingers were splayed wide. His little mouth was in the shape of a tiny 'O' and his eyes were wide open. It was as if he were saying, "Wow! Now this is something different!"

Today we celebrated his birth by inviting his friends from the neighborhood over for a wading pool party. Five families were represented and we had kids ranging in age from 6 months to 5 years. In addition to the pool, they enjoyed blowing bubbles, eating carrot cupcakes, and playing with Xavier's playhouse.

Here are some photos and video...enjoy!

Ethan in the playhouse.

Brook and Kiara.

The babies hung back and watched the "big kids" play in the pool.

Renee and Niona compare swimming costumes.

Ethan says hello to James.
Christopher takes a few steps.
David and Renee enjoy their carrot cupcakes.